she's eerily on the mark. one can't make themselves an enemy of the world without first making an enemy of themselves... right?
even if Abel couldn't ever truly become that person, ever again.
he watches her in favor of regarding the extended note in her hand. those blue eyes with all the intensity of someone who had replaced the smiling priest were... not right. there is an old, still-familiar guard up in him making a great show of keeping that emptiness glossing over everything underneath. but...
...but.
a hasty wall built over something cannot hold what lies on the other side away, back... cannot hide it. there is something terrible seeping through the cracks... something deep. a centuries-old bleed. something that had never left the dark places he had retreated to once upon a time, after he had lost it all -- everyone he loved. 'family.' everything.
he can't stand to watch history repeat itself. no-- it's more like he has yet to learn how to move past losing it all the first time around. he is trapped -- stuck in that part of himself, that part of his past, unable to let go...
he reaches out for the note in her fingers, but instead of taking it -- his fingers close over hers, crushing the piece of paper and forcing her hand into a fist over it. there's a single step forward... it doesn't take much to bridge the distance between them, and he's tilting his face slightly downward to lean lips by her ear. the words are quiet... but in this eerily silent tunnel -- with her astute sense of hearing -- he knows she won't miss it.]
...This is end of the line. Playing games with you was... nice, Ciel.
[pretending they could be something simple -- 'man' and a 'woman,' if just for a little while...
...]
But that's all it will ever be. It's time to wake up.
[all he'll ever be is a monster, and monsters belong with each other. trying to follow him here -- stop him... it's as wasted an effort as there could be. he isn't an innocent victim, or some... gentle soul misguided and needing her protection before he takes himself somewhere unpleasant and scary.
he's no better than them. they deserve to destroy each other.
...but she...
Ciel is better than that... and he will never let someone he loves follow him down to dark places ever again. there is no saving his soul. there's only losing yours in the pursuit.]
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...
she's eerily on the mark. one can't make themselves an enemy of the world without first making an enemy of themselves... right?
even if Abel couldn't ever truly become that person, ever again.
he watches her in favor of regarding the extended note in her hand. those blue eyes with all the intensity of someone who had replaced the smiling priest were... not right. there is an old, still-familiar guard up in him making a great show of keeping that emptiness glossing over everything underneath. but...
...but.
a hasty wall built over something cannot hold what lies on the other side away, back... cannot hide it. there is something terrible seeping through the cracks... something deep. a centuries-old bleed. something that had never left the dark places he had retreated to once upon a time, after he had lost it all -- everyone he loved. 'family.' everything.
he can't stand to watch history repeat itself. no-- it's more like he has yet to learn how to move past losing it all the first time around. he is trapped -- stuck in that part of himself, that part of his past, unable to let go...
he reaches out for the note in her fingers, but instead of taking it -- his fingers close over hers, crushing the piece of paper and forcing her hand into a fist over it. there's a single step forward... it doesn't take much to bridge the distance between them, and he's tilting his face slightly downward to lean lips by her ear. the words are quiet... but in this eerily silent tunnel -- with her astute sense of hearing -- he knows she won't miss it.]
...This is end of the line. Playing games with you was... nice, Ciel.
[pretending they could be something simple -- 'man' and a 'woman,' if just for a little while...
...]
But that's all it will ever be. It's time to wake up.
[all he'll ever be is a monster, and monsters belong with each other. trying to follow him here -- stop him... it's as wasted an effort as there could be. he isn't an innocent victim, or some... gentle soul misguided and needing her protection before he takes himself somewhere unpleasant and scary.
he's no better than them. they deserve to destroy each other.
...but she...
Ciel is better than that... and he will never let someone he loves follow him down to dark places ever again. there is no saving his soul. there's only losing yours in the pursuit.]